Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Following In The Steps Of A Porn Star: Richard Armitage's Next Career Move

So...once the Hobbit hoopla is over Mr. Armitage is going to be cooling his heels again and he won't be alone. Californication has been cancelled which means that David Duchovny is going to be right there with him. Deep sigh there from all of us who appreciated Hank Moody in any way up to and including watching him get his freak on.

I was thinking about this today out loud on Twitter and I got some encouragement from the usual cast of loons so keep this in mind. Boyfriend said he wanted to work on independent films and it doesn't get much more independent than John Waters. You know, Crybaby...Hairspray...Pink Flamingoes. The guy who once appeared on Letterman and said he had a Fashion Police badge and wasn't afraid to use it.

Waters himself is always elegantly turned out, from his pencil thin moustache to his wingtips. I once sat in the Mecca on Queen Anne in Seattle waiting for my boss and trying to figure out where I knew the nattily dressed man at the counter from when he turned and I saw his profile. The Seattle International Film Festival was in full swing at that moment. I resisted the urge to throw myself at his shinily shod feet and worship at the altar of his goofiness.

Anyway, here's the thing. The actor that I most associate with John Waters is the divine Divine. John Travolta didn't come close to filling his bra cups in the remake of Hairspray. So, Mr. Waters, if you happen to be in the market for someone who can wear padding and a wig and actually, you know, act you're in luck because I have a two-for-one for you.

Duchovny actually has the experience here from his time as DEA Agent Dennis/Denise Bryson on Twin Peaks. While Richard Armitage has talked about being in drag he's also talked about being a giant dancing banana and I haven't seen photographic proof of that, either, so we'll just have to take his word for it. Think of it, though: all that masculine beauty stuffed into a push-up bra. Doesn't that twitterpate you? That one could be just me but given the conversation today I somehow doubt it.

Anyway. Richard Armitage and David Duchovny in drag. Didn't I say I wasn't going to think about this? Okay, so I lied again.

14 comments:

  1. I lack almost every necessary reference for understanding this post. I did, however, see Armitage photoshopped with Lee Pace in drag recently somewhere on tumblr :)

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    1. Did you? Wow, this fandom...just to let you (and anyone else who's wondering) know Divine isn't the porn star in the title. That's Traci Lords who was in "Crybaby."

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    2. Ditto about "p" references. Jazzy, you have a unique perspective. Ha!

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  2. I love the breadth of the fandom! As one who's oblivious to contemporary pop culture and wouldn't know a Kardashian from an...I don't know what, I'm mollified by knowing every single reference for understanding this post. Guess it's just a matter of personal experience, and back in the days of truly independent cinema, I did frequent midnight shows in the funkier New York City movie houses. Thank you for this walk down memory lane, funkyblue. I'm chuckling mightily as I remember my first viewing of Divine.
    Armitagebesotted

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    1. I actually first saw Divine in a picture that was attached to a People magazine review of maybe Pink Flamingoes and he really flummoxed me for a while. Stick around, I talk about all kinds of irrelevant nonsense. :)

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  3. But which one are you pushing for to see in drag? Duchkovny or Armitage? Or both together? I'll admit, as the blogger who keeps trotting out potential BBC miniseries for Armitage, something like this didn't occur to me - but yeah, I think they could make him into a beautiful drag queen.

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    1. Both of them, singing "Ring of Fire" and riding mechanical bulls.

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  4. John Waters ... a staple in this household's viewing library.
    I agree, JT didn't hold a candle to Divine. Not even a match.

    Captivating idea. He would be lovely. Needs to have a really good story, though. Something like "To Wong Foo." Yeah, I'd buy that. ;)

    Ahhh, Queen Anne! I love that section of the city. So many cool places.

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    1. My office was on the other end of Mercer across from Seattle Center. I got distracted more than once on my way back from lunch. :)

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  5. What a great idea! :D

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    1. I thought you might be down for it, Joanna. :)

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  6. Ech, the Hairspray remake was ABYSMAL in so many ways!

    Anyway, you mentioned David Duchovny, which immediately gets this ol' X-Phile's full attention! When I saw him in Twin Peaks for the first time, I must have laughed for a good ten minutes straight. Fox Mulder all dressed up, oh it was too funny. :D Haven't seen any of Californication, sadly, but maybe I could get around to it at some point. Guessing it's worth watching?

    As for DD + RA in the same show/film, with or without drag? Count me in!

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  7. David Duchovny = love. No equation there. I don't straight up adore everything he does but I have a huge soft spot for Fox and Hank. Hank is difficult and I don't always like him but they hit the jackpot when they cast him. I've always kind of wondered what it meant to him to play a novelist in light of who his father was.

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